butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I cut my penus on the lid.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
