Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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