dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
