dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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