I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I'm going to jail i love you
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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