Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
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