Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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