Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
