is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
