garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
