Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
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