Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
