you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
