Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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