I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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