I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
