If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
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I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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