she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
soo... how was my night?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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