You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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