Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Randomize
