Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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