she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
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