isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize
