Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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