Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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