There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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