just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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