im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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