all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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