i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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