that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
