Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize