all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
