I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
