She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I can feel your judgement through the phone
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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