So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
