Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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