Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Randomize
