we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
