I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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