i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
