hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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