Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
