Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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