Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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