I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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