its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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