so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
