Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
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