You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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