What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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